to rent a house.
to work so hard.
to find a boy.

Sigh.

wishpond

and the fuckstory shall end. the crow shall fly even to the middle of the sea...

silly

to ride you on my cycle. a wish from a long time ago.

it is time to leave. i had thought of writing a poem this day a week back. but i have nothing to say now. its time to leave. feels like im leaving a piece of me behind. things need to be done still. before its time to leave.

Ouch

Washed with care. Thought out for the next three days mostly. The mirror never lied. Oh so beautiful. Heart beating walk to the mess for breakfast. Sometimes hurried sometimes cool. How do I believe it will end tomorrow. How do I believe it's the last time tomorrow. How do I believe it's the last day of class tomorrow.

First Phase Polling

Red terror has been predominant as anticipated. Elections have been disrupted at several places in Jharkhand, Orissa, Chattisgarh.

In my polling station at shamirpet (Malkajgiri and Medchal Constituencies, Andhra Pradesh) about 260 people (About 1200 are registered there) had voted till 11 in the morning. All seemed so good. Lots of people men, women. Long ques in spite of the heat. So many of us have that faith and feel bound by duty. It was an amazing feeling. To have faith in that one vote. Magical.

I voted. I was so nervous inside. I'd never imagined that before. In the booth I was shaking as I cast my vote, scared I would mess up the buttons. I was fucking nervous. It feels so good.

Hope there is no further fuck up and secutiry is in control.

Elections 2009, India!

Today the 2009 general elections polling begins. My area goes to poll - Andhra Pradesh first phase. There's this crazy excitement, it's 1:30 in the morning and I get no sleep. You see I'm going to vote tomorrow for the first time. Long live democracy.

In Andhra Pradesh the polls are both for the centre and the state. I get to vote double. It's like I have something so precious in my hands. Idealistic? yeah very and very proud to be too.

I have done my homework. Checked up on the contesting candidates. The mandatory affidavits required of the candidates stating criminal record if any, any pending criminal charges FIRs, their assets and liabilities are available online for inspection on the election commissions website. All cheers to the Supreme Court for declaring that it was the citizens fundamental right to know all about contestants (Association for Democratic Reforms Case and the PUCL Case). Im working on decriminalisation of politics for my election seminar, more on that soon. Details about candidates are summarised on Association for Democratic Reforms Website as well.

Which party I'd like to see in power at first doesnt seem difficult to choose. But then I ask what kind of a party doesnt try to make up for the past. 1984 trial is still not done? Hello....

God knows what is worse. But I can say which leaders are better at least.

But sadly my hopes of voting the congress back to power may have been crushed by the congress itself. Their candidate from my area has an FIR filed against him under Section 353 of the Indian Penal Code for assaulting a government official and disrupting his functioning. Nothing is proved yet. I don't know what to do. Vote for him or not vote for him. Had charges been framed I'd surely not vote for him. Oh God damn the congress for putting me through such testing times.....DON'T PUT UP TAINTED CANDIDATES, SHOULDNT BE THAT DIFFICULT.

We shall vote at sunrise, I will pray that someday, in my lifetime our politics will be clean.

Gratitude

I cleaned the window, cleaned the lamp, dusted the speakers, moped the floor. I emptied the plastic rack and washed it under the tap. I took care of the spider webs and dusted the fan. I put away old newspapers and put important papers in place, important being randoms words scribbled here and there. I smiled with regret as I found stuff that I was supposed to put up on my wall. I bundled up clothes fifty pieces to give to the dhobi. I did it all with so much care. I was doing it all for the last time. It was time to leave. Leave home.

Summer Moon

The moon doesn't care enough to move.
The summer ain't that hot.
A lover seeks the other in all the emptiness created.