Love distorted by anger, desire and cinema.

Dreams and the little bit of ambition disappear.

I watch myself becoming bigger than my dreams.

Maybe I'll crash into the earth and burst into flames.

Maybe I'll just fly past, untouched.

Blue jeans, yellow tee shirt.

Quiet, very quite.

Searching eyes, waited and waited.

Magic

"जादू है मेरी हाथों में"

There is magic in my hands, I swear. This is what I've been saying since I was young. But there is magic in my hands, I swear. I swear. I can fix broken things. Touch of my hands and a computer thats not been working for months starts working. Come to my house on christmas, I do the house beautifully. I wash my clothes, better than any washing machine. I ride my cycle like a dream. I make good pav bhaji. These are just material things but hand on my heart if I were a surgeon/doctor I'd never let anyone who came to me die. That kind of magic I believe, that kind of power, that kind of faith. Some corner of my heart I'm convinced I was born to be a surgeon. I never tried being one, I'm just convinced now. Reminds me of an old man saw my fingers when I was young and said I was going to be a surgeon.

There was this boy I loved once. I could still fight the world for him, run the earth two times over, take him flying with my wings around him over the violent cruel sea and keep him safe, I have that kind of power. I don't love him romantically now, but I love him. I always believed that if I touched his face just once, with the tip of my fingers, it would work magic. He wouldn't even have to know that I touched his face, maybe if I could just touch it while he was asleep. His troubles would come to an end, it would have nothing to do with me, just that my hands would work magic. That kind of power, that kind of faith.

There is magic in my hands, I swear.

As I Please

I'll use you to write my poem.
I'll use you to write my story.
I'll use you to keep me alive.
I'll use you to feel pretty at times even.
I'll love you when I want to.
I'll forget you for a while even.
And when I fancy another boy
I'll fall in love with him too.
Love him.
Really love him.
I'll droole over that face of yours.
I'll laugh when I see you smile.
I'll envy your hair.
Each time I write, I'll write for you.
I'll walk past you when I'm happy.
I'll walk past you when I'm sad.
I'll sing to you even.
I'll use you.
And I'll use you.
And I'll use you.
What are you going to do about it???

Pineapple Pastry

Cold cold morning. In her city. She isn't going to meet me on time. So I go watch a movie. She'll be ten minutes. So I walk the lanes of the market, two times over. I haven't eaten since morning so I go eat a pineapple pastry. She tells me she's just reaching. I throw the paper plate in the dustbin and go meet her.

It was time, to sin again.